motivation

hi,

Yesterday, i gav Kristy my first eva food diary after the nutrition session...she was so impress... i think like myself, she also don't believe i will follow her suggestion.. at first, looking at her food planning, deep inside, i also think this is not going to work... but as i am changing both my food and exercise regime, it making it hard not to follow what ever she said.. the amount of time and energy i spend in gym, making me more conscious of  the decision i make.. i still remember the warm up session during the pt, the warm up was 7 min on the bike on a kilomanjaro hill mode level 9 i think which make me sweat after a few minutes and when it is done she said we burn one apple or one bread... then i realise no wonder i never lose weight... this is so hard.. that is why i feel guilty to my body who work hard during all the work out if i feed them wrongly.. this is my biggest motivation... it is so hard to exercise too much, it is so hard to eat restrictedly.. this is how much sacrifice need to be done to lose weight healthily.. u can dont eat and lose weight but u will lose more muscle mass rather than fat.. in a long run, u will be weak... hence it is important to do it the right way... this so much effort, time, money, energy been a big part of motivation to get goin...i been this far but there r still long way to go..

the second motivation is surely my family and friends.. when i was younger, my mum said heart attack is just an excuse actually what  happen was that  it was ur dad time hav arrive and God want him back, He know best and this is the best for him... as a young teenager, u believe all what my mum said.. in a way it is also true what my mum said...what mean to be will be... God know best..but again God also want us to improve ourselves...heart attack due to obesity is preventable in some ways..but as i grew older, my dad, my grandma who live with me died of sudden heart attack... my mum n brother under high blood pressure medication... all my sibling except my youngest brother r overweight, as u grew older, u r wiser n know this all cant happen coincidently, there must be reason for all this...i love my family so much.. i want them to be happy, to live longer experiencing all the beauty of life...but again sometimes lavish and free will lifestyle sometimes do hurt you in some ways.. sometimes regardless how much we hate it, we need some discipline.. hopefully, with making this changes, my family will want to follow me... but again now with my house mates who are young people who should be open minded with new things also dont want to eat my food...always eeeu eeew here and there when trying my food... cant imagine my family who always eating delicious food 24/7.. this is going to be tough...but to change the world, we need to change ourselves..   May God always be with me in this tough journey.. besides my families, i also have some close friends who are obese.. hopefully, this will inspire them to lose weight and sometimes it is more than just self image, this is because every extra pound you carry come with the increase threat to health..health is the most important aspect in life...even money cant buy health.. although nearly all my girlfriends are skinny but hopefully this will inspire them to live healthier... good metabolism is a bless but a skinny body does not indicate a healthy self....

the third motivation that always motivate me is Kristy.. i know this sound gay.. but she is a real inspiration...she is a businesswoman, a personal trainer and a nutritionist..on top of that, she instruct classes in uni gym which i am sure does not pay her much... then, she did research about diabetes.. she is also a good dancer....recently, there is le tour de gym in the uni gym which just mimic le tour de France... she participate in 2 groups and one individual...she said as a trainer she need to set good examples to others especially uni students and which hopefully will inspire others...  this two weeks, she also will take most other instructor classes who r away...she got lots of money...but still giving bak by working in the uni gym n helping ppl lyk me who dont pay her much...on top of dat, she still manage to look hot and hav a life... .. i don't know where she got all the energy....she seem to hav everything very gal dream... successful, able to giv bak, helping others, hot, rich, she is also a very intelligent woman ...one day, i pray that i will be as successful as her... n hav a cool job like her... but still be able to give bak and help people... on top of that, she still manage to smile and spend time entertaining my stupid questions...i think i waste too much  time doing nothing... hopefully one day i will know what i want to do and make full use of time n b lyk her utilising full potential...She's been a big motivation to me... at first, i thought she is just a trainer and she got so so so many clients and i dont think she would care about me.. but seeing her so supportive in any possible ways it is hard 4 me to let her down.. i will never be able to repay her and  only God can repay her and may God bless u always... i will b eternally grateful for all dis...

lastly, the biggest motivation to do this would be myself.. i said to my friend, i will never dated an overweight guy.. this is true.. weight have been a major battle for me.. it is not so much of self image..i am bless with wonderful friends who dont discriminate me.. it more of things that i am not capable of doing because of my weight... i do love sport but up to some point, i always need to stop or back up because i get tired or i get injured... the second things is that clothing... in nz, it is fine.. i wore the biggest size for normal woman store... but in Malaysia, i need to spend more money on clothing compared to others... i can only wear size that have numbers which indicate i need to buy overseas brand such as Dorothy Perkins, Mark n Spencer... this limit my choice of clothing and waste my money.. this is just tiny miny reason... i been doing a lot of things which i think i will never be able to do and successfully doing them well but when comes to weight i always lose in the battle... sometimes, it would be fun to be good at things u r not good with... sometimes it is good to taste the sweetness of hard work.. things been so easy to me that i become so lazy, laid-back n miss so much opportunity... not been where i should be, lose the one that i love truly, madly, deeply, ungrateful and taking things for granted... this is just a weight lose journey but in a way, it become emotional...every step in the treadmill remind me all the memories of the lose opportunity, how grateful i should be, the unwise decision done.... i know we shouldn't hav regret...i dont.. but sometimes it is good to reminiscent the past and make sure they dont repeat itself.. hopefully, this sweet bitter journey making me more appreciative and grateful of things that i have.. hopefully this wrist injury, physically pain dont stop me from trying... lastly hopefully i will be tougher... n hopefuly what hurt but does not kill, make me stronger...peace..

A step towards healthy lifestyles...

After going to Kristy class for a while, i just know that if i was to do this, i will be doing it with her.. i been telling my friends, some are supportive, some think i am just being ridiculous and weight lose is not that dramatic... but again time is not a luxury.. i was so busy and i dont think this will be a good time to do this.. but one day, a reality strike, i realise time will always pass by and it was never a luxury.. if we keep on waiting, it will just fly away... so in June 2011, i make my mind to do something with my weight... after gaining enough courage, i talk with Kristy about my intention to be fitter and healthier... she was so pleased but she said she would love to help but she said this is no playing game...it is real hard work....  i feel a bit freak out and decide i will only start after my final exams which was in 3 weeks time... it is true what she said this is more mental strength rather than physical capacity.. in the 3 weeks period, there are a few times i feel like not doing them..

at last, the time have come... i was so nervous that day my resting heart rate is so high... it started with a blood pressure check, measurement, fat test and then a photograph session which she said to remind me one day how far i been.. then, from all the test, she concluded that i have a good heart so i will be able to do hardcore gym work..ahahha... but i have a  high percentage of fat which mostly centred at my stomach which is medically dangerous... this increase the likeliness of cardiovascular disease.. at that moment, i realise this is not just a playing game of trying to be healthy but this is something i really need to do.. she said now the urgency is to lose weight... she said the less urgent to lose weight, the more focus to lead healthier lifestyles... but as for now, the urgency to lose weight is really high..

the training program she prescribed include a 8 hours of training per week... at first, it seem impossible but after a while, the training part is not a big problem.. but again this is easy to me because i been playing sport all my life... but for people who are overweight but never exercise, you need to start it slowly and 8 hours is quite dangerous to begin with... i use to easy life... the only difficulties that i face is that this hard work is not my comfort zone.. i feel sore everywhere every single days... there are moment i feel like giving up... but as time pass by, pain become my friend and i learn to suck up all the soreness... sometimes, we need to do things the difficult ways to better appreciate them.. honestly, this is the most hard work that i ever endure in my lifetime... i am quite gifted with intelligence so i never really struggling with my studies and the same goes with finance.. i am the youngest girl in my family, i always get away with everything...now i understand better some struggle my friends face in their life... some ways, trying to lose weight make me learn more about myself and life...the boundaries that i been putting and the so much strength that i got that i never realise... one thing for sure, if i manage to lose weight i will help others to do so.. but again everything come with a price to pay... and every exercise come with injury to endure... now i got a wrist problem which i hope nothing serious.. i will know the result tomorrow.. but that is life, there is always setback.. but we need to stay strong and just have faith in things that we want..

then the food part... i guess this is the harder part..
 
     1.  i need to eat every 2-3 hours which is hard to accommodate..
     2.  then, some of the food was never in my food diary...
     3.  no sugar policy is even worst
     4. and lastly most days without carbs at dinner time...
     5. so much veges
     6. water water water

 the first part  and the last one it still in mess... i always forget to eat and drink enough plain water.. i tried to be more organised but still you hardly plan life... sometimes, you already plan to eat then your friend come and talk about her problem, you can't easily say please excuse me i need to eat.. so still with so much responsibility, i still try to figure out how to eat every 2-3 hours.. the second problem is okay, we discuss that when designing the food plan besides some of the food i dont like, she tried to make it so that it will go inline with my taste bud.. no sugar policy was hard as i am a big fan of tea and ice blended... but after a while, i fall in love with green tea and it is acceptable to drink without sugar.. the carbs problem also settled.. i dont know where it come from but i manage not to eat carbs at all at night...  and i also started to love veges... my eating habit is till in mess...it is healthy but chaotic... i still slack here and there hopefully will be better in time..

it been nearly 2 weeks with my healthy lifestyle... it is hard as this is not my comfort zone.. and on top of that, sometimes,  people around you let you down.. or people don't really understand... people who will always discourage you... or a friend feel insecure with your changes and trying to stop you... or friends who hate you no longer go to Stabuck with them and will say this and that... or friends who don't know and curious why you been declining their invitations...but whatever you do in this world, there are always people who say that you cant... i remember when i want to do Algebra paper, people say this will only make your CGPA go downhill... but again as long as you have enough determinations and self belief that this is what you want, things will be alright and on top of that  having willingness to sacrifice to achieve your dream.... there will always be obstacles, hardship along the ways but just stay calm and have faith in things that you do.. if it is important to you and if is it things you want to do, just go ahead.. never go against yourself... do what you want to do and do it with all your heart...to give without counting the cost...to losing weight, healthier lifestyle and inspiring others.. lastly, one things for sure, sometimes we need more than just hard work, we need professional help... cheers

Hi

Hi everybody...

Weight loss is always a mystery to everyone including me, myself... I am always overweight since 5 years old... I do play sport sometimes, but as i live in city, life mostly is sedentary...movies, hanging out in Starbuck, playstation and da list goes on...and i have real passion for food...i don't eat as much as what people think, but i do love trying new food... whenever people say there is a new restaurant in town, i will be the one being so excited to go there... but unlike other overweight people, i am blessed with people who does not discriminate against size... i live a pretty normal life and my size never interfere with  anything... as i play sport, people always say that it is okay to be big as long as you are healthy.. but as time pass by, i grown into a young woman and i realise that reality is not as sweet as what people around me been saying to me... when i was 21 years old, i move to overseas to further my studies... Here, where all the stories begin..

As a uni student,  the uni gym is quite affordable... there, where i realise how not fit i was... people run as fast as 12 for woman and 15 for man... i don't know weather this is due to the long leg of the Caucasian or just that they r too fit.. then, from there i started to read about fitness and health... i did lose 8 kg in the first year unintentionally.. it was the first time being so far away from family, i always converted things to my country currency and realise how expensive things were and rarely eat takeaways and also i was so excited with the gym, i did so so much cardio, introduced to group fitness step, TKO, cardio funk and the list goes on....  then it was summer hols, i went back to my country, things happen and i stop going to the gym... but still, i do develop a real passion towards healthy lifestyle... i learn to eat salad and find it was quite nice... i read some of the ways to lose weight but i am quite scared that it is not safe to do so...so i just read them as knowledge but never apply them to life... so over the 2.5 years here, i gain back 8kg that i lose during my first year in university slowly...

one thing i forget to mention is that about my family... my grandmother who stay with me and my dad passed away because of sudden heart attack.. my mum and my brother have been on blood pressure medication for some times... all my family members are overweight except my nephews and youngest brother... besides that, my best fren is also overweight... obviously there is something that need to change...

over the years, i been trying to find people to help me with weight lose... the answer people been telling me is that don't eat but i know it is not safe... i like things to be safe..... weight lose is one of the few things i never been able to master...my mum suggested that i try to find a personal dietician and trainer but again i dont want to work with people that i dont like.... i got a bestfren that is so close with me so when she went back to her country, i miss her so much and started to do things that she loves... one of them is that i started going to a group fitness class of one of her favourite trainer... and here where the story begin...